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Parenting - Forget About That Super Nanny! Be Your Own Childs Hero!

June 6th, 2008 Posted in Home and Family

The thought leaders who strike at our hearts with themes such as “Wife Swap” and “Desperate Housewives” predictably manipulate what their own media will portray. But why are we also glorifying their boob tube bully who demeans us as parents and barks out orders at our children?

MORE THAN 5000 CHILDREN ARE
EXPELLED FROM PRE-SCHOOL EACH YEAR

Pre-school children are three times as likely to be expelled as all those in kindergarten through grade 12 combined!

On average, pre-school boys are expelled at 4.5 times the rate of girls

African-American pre-schoolers are expelled at twice the rate of Latinos and Caucasians

4 year olds are expelled at 1.5 times the rate of 3 year olds

Expulsions are about twice as common in classrooms where teachers have no access to expertise outside the scope of their proscribed training.

I talk to one family after the other who admits to being ill-at-ease with their chosen contractors. No noticeable abuse is involved, but they know their child is neither being loved nor nurtured. Under the care of a fully qualified childcare provider their most vulnerable is simply not flourishing. While parents are clamoring to get their loved ones into the “right” learning environment and more than one half of all U.S. states now have a form of universal pre-school firmly in place, children are being expelled from their very first classroom experience in droves. In light of this unprecedented young child experiment, are we more willing to embrace a socialist dictatorship or Fearless Parenting in America?

Consider A Mastermind Approach
Rather than taking in hordes of unsolicited academic and medical advice, products, and directives warning you about what you are doing wrong as a parent, may I challenge you to invite team players who will support your strategic family plan instead of their own agenda?

What are the greatest strengths your parents gave you? What would you like to improve now that it is finally your turn? How is your family asking to be supported? Follow their clues to find fulfillment in this brief season in your lives.

When you need help reaching your goal line, consider a gentle alliance to support you in mastering the art of compassionate child rearing.

Do Your Due Diligence

  • What stage (not age) of development is your child in? In what kind of environment is he or she most likely to thrive: large group, private tutoring, or another combination? Be honest in your assessment. This should guide your choice in curriculum and settings.

  • Read all that is available about the programs that fit your criteria. Take the tours, but then also stop by unannounced to get a real feel for the place. Watch children as they enter school at the beginning of the day and see how those children seem to feel at the end of the day. The attitude of the children and parents as they go to and from school, and the interactions that take place on the playground, may speak volumes about the tenor of the faculty and administration.

    Make Friends with the Noisy Parent Group (NPG)

  • Speak with the most active and vocal parents whose children attend the schools you are considering as well as others who have moved on. They will give you information no one else will. Ask about pros and cons - and in what way the school is best serving their children, and what they would like to see changed or augmented.

  • If you are moving to a new school, see if your child can try it out for a week or two. While it often takes longer than that for a child to assimilate, you and your child will have a strong sense of the school from a two-week trial. Some also prefer having their child shadow a friend.

  • Attend a parent’s meeting at the school. See what matters to the parents, and what their involvement with the school looks like first hand.

    • You might well have your lifestyle down to a science. You know what it takes to sign the big contracts, support a worthy cause, get to the cleaners, the massage therapist, keep the nanny happy, and then jump in bed before starting the whole process all over again the next day. But planning your calendar to include family building can also inspire Olympic level interactions also giving you the home team advantage.

    Adelaide Zindler is a Pre-school and Family Life Coach with a Bachelor’s degree in Child Development, who found herself pregnant with a second child after 23 years. Trained in nutrition and life coaching, Adelaide is also an award winning author who has been widely quoted in major publications around the country and has contributed to both ABC and Fox affiliates. She invites you to read her story, her client stories and to share yours at:
    http://FearlessParenting.com/. What would make your journey as a parent even more rewarding than it already is? Sign up for her free tips and receive a series of complimentary gifts including an audio from her 7-week training series for parents. http://FearlessParenting.com/.

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    This entry was posted on Friday, June 6th, 2008 at 1:24 am and is filed under Home and Family. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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